it's no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then

Things left to do before leaving town

1. Make suitcase close

2. Paint toenails

Road trippin towards the future

I've got 50 resumes to give to potential graduate advisors stapled together with a hand signed cover letter my wonderful lab manager said was excellent, printed on recycled paper, folded into thirds and put neatly inside of recycled envelopes

I have a poster displaying my research which I have slaved over for the last six weeks, or two years if you count the actual research part- which I promptly ripped the corner of after printing.

I have a rental car for 11 days and a hostel reserved for 8 nights.

I have a dog sitter.

I have a handle of vodka and a box of wine.

I have a list of presentations pertaining to fish, conservation or geospatial systems which I will be attending next week at the Ecological Society of America's national meeting in Albuquerque, New Mexico.

I have a great friend willing to drive to NM from south Texas with me in the spirit of the great American road trip.

I have dogs to kiss goodbye and a basil plant to drop off down the street.

I have friends to meet in ABQ: new, old and as of yet unknown.

Now, I just gotta get my clothes into one suitcase!

Thoughts

Hear roommmate, or roommate's boyfriend, clipping their toenails...

-why do I feel they are flying everywhere?

Do I judge too quickly?

(after observation)

No.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

Nuthin' like packing for a conference when you have been without a gym membership or freetime all summer! So much fun!!!

Analysis of a spicy bloody mary.

When I used to think of the ingredients involved in a bloody mary, I cringed. Seriously, you want me to drink tomato juice and vodka? For breakfast? No thank you.

Then on a sunny January afternoon, I went into Molly's at the Market in New Orleans. Everyone ordered bloody marys, I got water.

I tasted someone's bloody mary out of foodie curiousity and the world exploded into a delicious sensation of flavors and refreshment! I promptly ordered my own, and several more after that, and have since become quite the lover of blody marys.

It is breakfast in a glass. It is a Sunday morning anyday of the week, but I try to save my early afternoon boozing for non-working days ;)

I carefully watched the sassy, tattooed bartender at Molly's as she crafted me some liquid perfection and I wrote down every single one of the many ingredients that made up the spicy heaven in a glass.

I took that list home and tried to recreate it- and well, my culinary style is more interpretive than by the book, so I changed things and tried things and the ending result is a pretty mean bloody mary that has friends running over to visit anytime I whip up a pitcher.

Spicy Sunday Bloody Mary:

Get a large cup (or pitcher) and fill with ice. I don't think anyone wants to drink warm tomato juice- think cold, cold, cold. Cold = refreshing and lovely! I do vodka first, so I can keep track of how much I add. I dunno how much, depends on the day and crowd. Maybe a shot and a half per person- maybe 2?

Then add a few good shakes of worstershire sauce. A dash of Cajun chef hot sauce (optional- I sometimes pass on this). A splash of olive or pickle juice. A good shake or two of Tony Chachere's Cajun Seasoning. I like to add some fresh ground black pepper. A generous squeeze of fresh lemon and lime juice. Then equal parts Spicy V8 and Mr. and Mrs. T's Spicy Bloody Mary mix.

I make these in mason jars usually, so I put on the lid and give it a good shake until everything is mixed and very cold. In a pitcher I stir for a few minutes.

Garnish with lemon and lime wedges, olives, celery stalks, and if you can- the best garnish of all: pickled green beans. I get a jar or two at the grocery store everytime I got to New Orleans. They really set off the bloody mary and I also use the juice inside the drink also.

Then, find a shady stoop or patio table. Gather friends. Enjoy some spicy conversation and beverages.

Repeat if necessary until it becomes naptime.

Have a happy Sunday.
:)

Not enough me time

That sums up my summer.

Too much-

too much work

too much not going to the beach

too much stress

too much money spent

Too little-

surfing

money

relaxation

studying


I need to regroup, relax, rejuvenate and rethink.

I need more time to work out and have fun.

I need a pause button. Things are moving so fast. Time flies. Days pass. What have I done with the last few months?

I love my life and everything in it so much- I have to find the time to do the things which define me, as a person.

I want to do so much in my lifetime- but time just seems to slip away and I feel like wasted oppurtunities abound.

I just want to make an impact during my short stay on this planet.

This girl she is a writer.

Oh yeah, I have a blog.

Oh yeah, I have the soul of an artist with ideas and imagination and dreams- just hovering, waiting to be released upon the Universe.

Oh crap, I am so busy these days.

Balance- where does one find it? In downward dog or child's pose? Somewhere between a bottle of Cabernet and a margarita? In the eyes of the dogs or man I love? At the beach or in the woods?

Breathe in... breathe out.... Roll your neck from side to side slowly. Sit up straight, close your eyes and imagine nothing.

Peace.

Serenity.

Focus... that I lack so desperatly.

Breathe out- slowly...

Hear the kids jumping on my trampoline outside, having so much fun I can't imagine kicking them off even though they are a law suit waiting to happen.

Breathe in- slowly...

Know you decide to live every moment conciously and must remember to appreciate that life is this. Life is now. Life is a crazy whirlwind which will pass you by if you don't take notice.

This is your life, your moment. Your time is now and no other. Breathe. Live. Appreciate and enjoy every moment- because jet engines can fall out of the sky and end what you take for granted at any moment. Live- this is your life, and it can pass you by.

This is me, going to enjoy the evening with my dogs who love me.

From South Texas to Maine

That is what I have been doing for the last week- just got home.

I am tired, but it was fun! I had never been to the northeast US before!

Good to be home except that my Lola dog is limping around for some reason. Hope she feels better in the morning!

Loving on a Saturday!

I slept in until almost ten today! Now am having a refreshing grilled chicken salad with homeade light ranch dressing. And in a few minutes a friend will pick me up for a morning of burning calories by fighting the waves!

Everything about being at the beach is such a great workout! I think that is part of why I got so fit when I first moved to Corpus Christi!

I would go to the beach almost everyday! But, I had a working car and nothing else to do- which is not exactly the case these days.

My fav. easy marinade for grilled chicken for eating with salads:

2 parts olive oil
1 part redwine vinegar
1 part balsamic vinegar
A few good shakes of Cavender's Greek Seasoning
some cracked black pepper

I pour this directly on the chicken in a tupperware container with a lid and then shake to mix and coat. I think this is best if it marinades for a day, but it tastes good in just thirty minutes! Then, grill it up! I am sure you could bake them also, but here in south Texas we have about 360 days of grilling weather a year, so we make good use of them!

I like to make a few of these at a time and keep them in the fridge. I slice them against the grain for salads by need, so they don't dry out. The flavor of the marinade is so mild, that you can use them with any type of salad or dressing and it doesn't conflict.

Opps... the beach calls, gotta go!
:)

Fessin' up!

Well, I may as well admit it, I am so out of shape! I have probably never been so covered in flab in my entire life! The problem stems from something healthy- for the first time in my life I truly believe that my self worth isn't equal to how attractive people find me. I have lots of friends who like me exactly as I am- fat or thin... and this can become a problem when you are a busy person who loves food and alcohol!

I don't like feeling flabby, but I find I lack the insane motivation I have always had before. I wanna be back at my goal weight, but I know no one else cares if I get there.

My whole life I have been so insecure and insecurity is such a great motivator.... where do you find it when you are secure? I wanna be fit and look great! I do, but I am a full-time student with like four jobs and no car.... How do I find motivation and fit it into my hectic life?

Well, trying to is the first step, and I have been, but in a kinda half-assed way. So, tomorrow I am publically starting to motivate myself back to my strong, toned body of yester-year!

I don't know exactly how or when I will make myself workout, but it has to happen more than twice a week- it just has to! I wanna wear my shorts from two years ago!

Well, here I go! One last cocktail, for a while anyway, a good nights sleep and then back to running in the AM.

I am sure between running, abstaining from alcohol and surfing this girl'll be buff by August! :)

Slacking

That is what I did until yesterday, I hadn't hit the gym since Spring Break!

It is so crazy how you can get so busy and then before you realize you haven't worked out in months and all your hard work has melted back into flab.

What can you do but get up, dust off those running shoes and get back in the game? I am taking a road trip to Maine in about three weeks and I intend to look good in the pictures!!

Feelin' private

Having an enormous change in the very foundation of who you are makes it hard to commnicate yourself to others. I mean, when you hardly know who you are, how do you pontificate on your self?

This last year brought huge changes into my life which I have adjusted to rather well, I believe, and I now find myself in a happy place.

The conundrum now, is whether I truly feel comfortable opening up my new life to the world.

Coming to terms with a new life has been interesting; ups and downs, self-discovery, time alone, time with friends, and time with new and interesting people. My life is about 100 percent different this May than last May and I feel... ok with it.

Naw, I feel great about where I am, who I am and where I am headed. Little secret here, I will say I feel pretty good about who I am headed there with ;)

Life remains good and I feel so positive about the future!

Birthday + CLEP test = bleh

-that is all I got.

14 freaking hours straight of macroeconomics, adderall, coffee, wine, water, redbull, water, having to pee, more freakin' water, more adderall, more peeing, iced tea, deliriousness, half a pack of cigarettes, 213 email checks, a grilled cheese sandwich, 359 facebook stopovers and about 30 plays of Louis Armstrong singing "Bare Necessities"...

God save me.

All this equals me still not computing an MPC value correctly and not quite getting what happens when this increases and that decreases or when there is leakage in the circular model.

And to all this I say, bleh!!!

And happy freakin' birthday to me!

I must be maturing with age, last year at this time I had half a handle of Margaritaville tequila in my belly, had been asked to leave a few bars and was still partying it up at a gay club!

Kurt Cobain says

"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are."

Dear Santa,

I can't read; it's a problem. I would love to read and retain info, savoring every word the author loving chose, however something I am pretty sure is close to ADD makes my reading adventures skimming for quotes. I basically read everything in Cliffnotes versions.

So, Santa Baby keep the diamond ring, convertible and please bring me the Kindle 2

Rae