it's no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then

My life these days.

Working out- I put this first as I didn't have gym access all Summer and now am a kid in a candy store!  Yoga, kickboxing, pilates... I am eating up the free aerobics classes like sour patch kids!

Dogs- thirty minutes walk, two times a day.  Bare minimum!  Trying to keep the ladies as healthy as possible!

GRE- ugh, basic math, big words... bleh.  Gotta get a good score!

Grad school mentors and grant applications... exciting!  Also, ready to be done and have somewhere lined up for next Fall!

Good tequila and imitation Grand Marnier- mmmm... so expensive and so yummy!  Best margaritas forty bucks can buy!

Time for a dog walk!

Ups and downs

I try really hard to not squander precious time here on this planet being sad or depressed. I feel I wasted so much time in my younger days because I was so unhappy and felt so alone all the time. I thought I was a tortured soul- which is ironic because it has been suicides of people I care about that helped me to realize life is for celebrating, not enduring. And I try to not focus on little things and appreciate every day for the small joys.

It is so easy to feel alone. Push a few people away and it is easy to convince yourself you are alone in the world. Put your guard up and build a few walls and you are untouchable- when the truth is your frieds are all still there, just a phone call away.

I feel a little lost right now. I guess I don't know where I am headed or what is going on right now. The only thing I feel I am sure about is that I love my work and I am so thankful to have that one thing to focus my energy on. A focal point to keep my eye on while everything else settles into place.

I could barely get out of bed yesterday, but that was yesterday, and to be truthful, I didn't even realize anything was wrong until about 5 pm when it occured to be, "Hey, I am usually out doing things at this point!" And maybe I was just tired, it's been a hectic summer for me, sometimes we all need to hibernate.

Today will not be squandered, I am going to seize the day and "live deliberately" (Thanks Thoreau)!

The world awaits!

(And my spell check button is missing!  Where did it go?)

Unspeakable joy.

Something I have fantasized about at length for a few months now-

brand new pillows!!!

Amazing! Heaven!

If you don't remember when you last replaced your pillows I recommend this:

1. Take off pillowcases, do not immediately replace.

2. Inspect and wonder, "So, do I actually drool that much- or was it the dogs?"

3. Shudder and go replace all pillows.

I got Ralph Lauren extra firm, amazing, heavenly pillows for an astonishing $5.49 each at Ross Dress for Less!

Woo-hoo! Cannot wait to sleep tonight!

Big sigh.

The value of waking up in one's own bed after a few weeks on the road cannot be descibed.

I was confused when I first began to rouse, "Where am I?", I pondered. "Oh yeah, home!"

Big sigh. "Ahhhh....."

So much to say, so little energy!

Been a long month!

Been to New Mexico, Boston and everywhere in between!

Had many ups and downs along the way.

Broke a rental car which may cost me a ton of money.

Saw some beautiful places I had never see before!

Caught up with an old friend or two- but sadly, missed a few a long the way.

Got chased away from Florida by a tropical storm.

Ate the best meatloag ever cooked!

And had a few tiki drinks!

And now, the lady goes to get her doggies and takes a well deserved nap!

Tequila + old friends = big hangover

Love the stimulating intellectual discussions until 4 am.

Love making memories with both old and new friends.

Love the fresh lime juice margaritas.

Hate waking up the next day to realize we overdid it, in a big way.

Bleh-

tomorrow will be a beautiful day!

:)

Heading out West

There is something so soothing about driving into the West. No cities, no traffic.

Just a big open sky, the road unfolding before you and your thoughts.

Big happy sigh.

Ahhhhhhh........

Things left to do before leaving town

1. Make suitcase close

2. Paint toenails

Road trippin towards the future

I've got 50 resumes to give to potential graduate advisors stapled together with a hand signed cover letter my wonderful lab manager said was excellent, printed on recycled paper, folded into thirds and put neatly inside of recycled envelopes

I have a poster displaying my research which I have slaved over for the last six weeks, or two years if you count the actual research part- which I promptly ripped the corner of after printing.

I have a rental car for 11 days and a hostel reserved for 8 nights.

I have a dog sitter.

I have a handle of vodka and a box of wine.

I have a list of presentations pertaining to fish, conservation or geospatial systems which I will be attending next week at the Ecological Society of America's national meeting in Albuquerque, New Mexico.

I have a great friend willing to drive to NM from south Texas with me in the spirit of the great American road trip.

I have dogs to kiss goodbye and a basil plant to drop off down the street.

I have friends to meet in ABQ: new, old and as of yet unknown.

Now, I just gotta get my clothes into one suitcase!

Thoughts

Hear roommmate, or roommate's boyfriend, clipping their toenails...

-why do I feel they are flying everywhere?

Do I judge too quickly?

(after observation)

No.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

Nuthin' like packing for a conference when you have been without a gym membership or freetime all summer! So much fun!!!

Analysis of a spicy bloody mary.

When I used to think of the ingredients involved in a bloody mary, I cringed. Seriously, you want me to drink tomato juice and vodka? For breakfast? No thank you.

Then on a sunny January afternoon, I went into Molly's at the Market in New Orleans. Everyone ordered bloody marys, I got water.

I tasted someone's bloody mary out of foodie curiousity and the world exploded into a delicious sensation of flavors and refreshment! I promptly ordered my own, and several more after that, and have since become quite the lover of blody marys.

It is breakfast in a glass. It is a Sunday morning anyday of the week, but I try to save my early afternoon boozing for non-working days ;)

I carefully watched the sassy, tattooed bartender at Molly's as she crafted me some liquid perfection and I wrote down every single one of the many ingredients that made up the spicy heaven in a glass.

I took that list home and tried to recreate it- and well, my culinary style is more interpretive than by the book, so I changed things and tried things and the ending result is a pretty mean bloody mary that has friends running over to visit anytime I whip up a pitcher.

Spicy Sunday Bloody Mary:

Get a large cup (or pitcher) and fill with ice. I don't think anyone wants to drink warm tomato juice- think cold, cold, cold. Cold = refreshing and lovely! I do vodka first, so I can keep track of how much I add. I dunno how much, depends on the day and crowd. Maybe a shot and a half per person- maybe 2?

Then add a few good shakes of worstershire sauce. A dash of Cajun chef hot sauce (optional- I sometimes pass on this). A splash of olive or pickle juice. A good shake or two of Tony Chachere's Cajun Seasoning. I like to add some fresh ground black pepper. A generous squeeze of fresh lemon and lime juice. Then equal parts Spicy V8 and Mr. and Mrs. T's Spicy Bloody Mary mix.

I make these in mason jars usually, so I put on the lid and give it a good shake until everything is mixed and very cold. In a pitcher I stir for a few minutes.

Garnish with lemon and lime wedges, olives, celery stalks, and if you can- the best garnish of all: pickled green beans. I get a jar or two at the grocery store everytime I got to New Orleans. They really set off the bloody mary and I also use the juice inside the drink also.

Then, find a shady stoop or patio table. Gather friends. Enjoy some spicy conversation and beverages.

Repeat if necessary until it becomes naptime.

Have a happy Sunday.
:)

Not enough me time

That sums up my summer.

Too much-

too much work

too much not going to the beach

too much stress

too much money spent

Too little-

surfing

money

relaxation

studying


I need to regroup, relax, rejuvenate and rethink.

I need more time to work out and have fun.

I need a pause button. Things are moving so fast. Time flies. Days pass. What have I done with the last few months?

I love my life and everything in it so much- I have to find the time to do the things which define me, as a person.

I want to do so much in my lifetime- but time just seems to slip away and I feel like wasted oppurtunities abound.

I just want to make an impact during my short stay on this planet.

This girl she is a writer.

Oh yeah, I have a blog.

Oh yeah, I have the soul of an artist with ideas and imagination and dreams- just hovering, waiting to be released upon the Universe.

Oh crap, I am so busy these days.

Balance- where does one find it? In downward dog or child's pose? Somewhere between a bottle of Cabernet and a margarita? In the eyes of the dogs or man I love? At the beach or in the woods?

Breathe in... breathe out.... Roll your neck from side to side slowly. Sit up straight, close your eyes and imagine nothing.

Peace.

Serenity.

Focus... that I lack so desperatly.

Breathe out- slowly...

Hear the kids jumping on my trampoline outside, having so much fun I can't imagine kicking them off even though they are a law suit waiting to happen.

Breathe in- slowly...

Know you decide to live every moment conciously and must remember to appreciate that life is this. Life is now. Life is a crazy whirlwind which will pass you by if you don't take notice.

This is your life, your moment. Your time is now and no other. Breathe. Live. Appreciate and enjoy every moment- because jet engines can fall out of the sky and end what you take for granted at any moment. Live- this is your life, and it can pass you by.

This is me, going to enjoy the evening with my dogs who love me.

From South Texas to Maine

That is what I have been doing for the last week- just got home.

I am tired, but it was fun! I had never been to the northeast US before!

Good to be home except that my Lola dog is limping around for some reason. Hope she feels better in the morning!