I applied for 5 today. 2 in this area that I should have a very good chance of getting!
Now, can something please pan out already?
Suspense is getting old!
Now We Wait
10 years ago
Excited!
The prospect of getting a job is getting me all a twitter! I really want this job in Houston that I am applying for. It sounds inspiring! Submitting my application today!!
Woo woo!!!
Take that painfully slow graduate funding committees!!
:)
Woo woo!!!
Take that painfully slow graduate funding committees!!
:)
plankton
That is what I am these days, planktonic larvae just floating on the current.
It seemed for a while that I would have more graduate school options than I could shake a stick at, but funding keeps shutting me down, and I am sick of waiting for something concrete to pan out! I have been working at getting into a graduate program where all is paid for since at least August, about nine months. Basically, I am sick of the whole mess.
So, I have started to look for jobs. I have found about five so far, spread throughout the southeast US. My applications should be submitted by Friday.
Will I go to graduate school? Will I get a job? Will I stay here and waste a few more years? Time will certainly tell.
All I can do is wait, drift with the current, and go where it takes me. Exciting. Scary. Frustrating. Relax, be plankton, go with the Universe- it will take us where we need to go.
*sigh*
Think plankton...
It seemed for a while that I would have more graduate school options than I could shake a stick at, but funding keeps shutting me down, and I am sick of waiting for something concrete to pan out! I have been working at getting into a graduate program where all is paid for since at least August, about nine months. Basically, I am sick of the whole mess.
So, I have started to look for jobs. I have found about five so far, spread throughout the southeast US. My applications should be submitted by Friday.
Will I go to graduate school? Will I get a job? Will I stay here and waste a few more years? Time will certainly tell.
All I can do is wait, drift with the current, and go where it takes me. Exciting. Scary. Frustrating. Relax, be plankton, go with the Universe- it will take us where we need to go.
*sigh*
Think plankton...
Quick thought.
I like to drink a lot.
I love trying new flavors.
I am captivated by the art of making a perfect cocktail.
I love talking with friends over a drink.
I love opening a new bottle of wine, or champagne!
But, I don't like being drunk.
I spent three days in New Orleans last week and not once did I cross that threshold, which seems crazy because we did drink quite frequently on the trip. Being drunk just feels yucky to me, and let's not even mention how miserable a hangover makes me!
I'd be so happy to spend the rest of my life never once being drunk again. The problem I encounter is what I started with: I love to drink for the ritual and experiences! Most times that I have drank too much has been the result of forgetting I have the alcohol tolerance of a preteen!
That's all.
I love trying new flavors.
I am captivated by the art of making a perfect cocktail.
I love talking with friends over a drink.
I love opening a new bottle of wine, or champagne!
But, I don't like being drunk.
I spent three days in New Orleans last week and not once did I cross that threshold, which seems crazy because we did drink quite frequently on the trip. Being drunk just feels yucky to me, and let's not even mention how miserable a hangover makes me!
I'd be so happy to spend the rest of my life never once being drunk again. The problem I encounter is what I started with: I love to drink for the ritual and experiences! Most times that I have drank too much has been the result of forgetting I have the alcohol tolerance of a preteen!
That's all.
Getting closer!
Wow! It's March! By the end of this month, I should know where I will be moving in July!
The options are so diverse and a bit scary! One feels comfortable, that is in Mississippi. I know I would like living here. I know what to expect here. I know the climate. I know the food, the lingo, the music- I feel comfortable with the whole idea. I know it would be relaxed, and I would fit in, and it would be great! But, that's kind of boring and I have other scarier options out there.
Such as Maine, which is definitely, maybe, interested in having me. Or Virginia, which was my "Out of My League" school, so why are they engaging me in conversation and taking me on a tour of their facility next week? Massachusettes- which is still a complete mystery to me. And Seattle, who may just be too cool for me after all.
All in all, I am tired of wondering and ready for answers! But, I am trying to regain my sense that this move will be exciting- a new place! Very new, and probably not comfortable. There will be growing pains. I will feel discomfort.
I just have to get the energy to keep pushing the professors I am talking to so they don't forget about me! It has been a marathon looking for a graduate school, but it would be silly to give up now- I am almost at the finish line!!!!!
The options are so diverse and a bit scary! One feels comfortable, that is in Mississippi. I know I would like living here. I know what to expect here. I know the climate. I know the food, the lingo, the music- I feel comfortable with the whole idea. I know it would be relaxed, and I would fit in, and it would be great! But, that's kind of boring and I have other scarier options out there.
Such as Maine, which is definitely, maybe, interested in having me. Or Virginia, which was my "Out of My League" school, so why are they engaging me in conversation and taking me on a tour of their facility next week? Massachusettes- which is still a complete mystery to me. And Seattle, who may just be too cool for me after all.
All in all, I am tired of wondering and ready for answers! But, I am trying to regain my sense that this move will be exciting- a new place! Very new, and probably not comfortable. There will be growing pains. I will feel discomfort.
I just have to get the energy to keep pushing the professors I am talking to so they don't forget about me! It has been a marathon looking for a graduate school, but it would be silly to give up now- I am almost at the finish line!!!!!
Lame.
I don't think I can afford a vacation, even a wonderfully cheap one, when I am moving to a new city (yet unknown) a week after I would return.
I forgot about things like apartment deposits, pet deposits, moving trucks, possibly still having to pay rent in Corpus for a month after moving (double rent in June! Yuck!)....
I can't exactly take a vacation and then call up my parents begging for money to help me move. No, that would be really, really lame.
Almost as lame as not getting to take an amazing Mexican vacation, but sadly not quite.
Honestly, moving is gonna tap me out.
So, my much needed and hey, deserved, vacation is postponed. Hoping for August, but maybe as late as October. Postponed, but not canceled. Never give up on your dreams, I have wanted to take this trip since as long as I can remember- and it is happening this year! Just not in May, not before I move.
Lame.
I forgot about things like apartment deposits, pet deposits, moving trucks, possibly still having to pay rent in Corpus for a month after moving (double rent in June! Yuck!)....
I can't exactly take a vacation and then call up my parents begging for money to help me move. No, that would be really, really lame.
Almost as lame as not getting to take an amazing Mexican vacation, but sadly not quite.
Honestly, moving is gonna tap me out.
So, my much needed and hey, deserved, vacation is postponed. Hoping for August, but maybe as late as October. Postponed, but not canceled. Never give up on your dreams, I have wanted to take this trip since as long as I can remember- and it is happening this year! Just not in May, not before I move.
Lame.
All nice men are still stupid boys
-says my sister, and she is a smart lady.
I wanted to know: Do they act better? Do they mature? Do they grow out of it?
No, she says, no. They never do. She called them silly boys. I call them stupid boys. They amaze me in a good way. And then they disappoint me. And then they amaze me again.
But, that's men for you.
I am just glad I am not a lesbian because I would rather deal with stupid boys, than crazy bitches.
;)
I wanted to know: Do they act better? Do they mature? Do they grow out of it?
No, she says, no. They never do. She called them silly boys. I call them stupid boys. They amaze me in a good way. And then they disappoint me. And then they amaze me again.
But, that's men for you.
I am just glad I am not a lesbian because I would rather deal with stupid boys, than crazy bitches.
;)
Sorry women of the world,
While you have all been working hard to keep advancing the status of women everywhere, I have been doing the opposite.
You see, I discovered today that when I want men to agree with me more easily, I use a baby voice, ala Marilyn Monroe or (yikes!) Paris Hilton, and I put on that cute "I am not sure in the world, please help me strong man" face.
I was surprised to realize, after thinking about it some more, that I do this all the time. You do attract more flies with sugar after all, so I doubt I will be changing my ways.
"I don't mind living in a man's world, as long as I can be a woman in it."
— Marilyn Monroe
;)
You see, I discovered today that when I want men to agree with me more easily, I use a baby voice, ala Marilyn Monroe or (yikes!) Paris Hilton, and I put on that cute "I am not sure in the world, please help me strong man" face.
I was surprised to realize, after thinking about it some more, that I do this all the time. You do attract more flies with sugar after all, so I doubt I will be changing my ways.
"I don't mind living in a man's world, as long as I can be a woman in it."
— Marilyn Monroe
;)
More quotes from the blonde bombshell:
"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition."
"Give a girl the right shoes, and she can conquer the world."
"We should all start to live before we get too old. Fear is stupid. So are regrets."
"Sometimes good things fall apart so that better things can fall together"
Should be...
studying Physics, but I am so sick of it!!!
In ten days, I will be headed off on a Spring Break adventure.
Stop 1- Houston, staying at old roommate's new loft in downtown. Sounds pretty fancy, hope me and my science nerd gals are cool enough.
Stop 2- New Orleans!! 1 night, city tour for my friend who hasn't been before, lots of walking and sight seeing.
Stop 3- Ocean Springs, MS, checking out a grad school, staying in the dorms. Next day at the beach, then back to New Orleans for 2 more nights of having too much fun!!! Some swamp hiking included.
Stop 4- home, ever so briefly, then off to Virginia to check out another grad school.
It's gonna be a whirlwind week!!
Tired.
I am seriously tired. I haven't been able to get up on time for the last week or so, and so I haven't gotten to workout every morning. This perpetuates this evil cycle where I am just tired, always.
I have a huge Calculus test on April 19 which determines if I actually graduate or not. It's pass or fail and it is all on me to get my studying done. This is weighing on my mind a lot, and I think compounding how tired I have been feeling.
So today, I work on Calculus, get exercise, get into bed by 10pm and wake up at 5 tomorrow to work out! These things are happening, better get moving.
Only one thing could sidetrack me.... I fear my fridge is broken! Still keeping up hopes it'll suddenly spring back to life. If it breaks, this is my second broken fridge in a year! Bonus, it is totally stocked. I just filled the freezer with meat and the fridge with veggies. Here's hoping I spend today studying and not moving my food to friend's houses.
I have a huge Calculus test on April 19 which determines if I actually graduate or not. It's pass or fail and it is all on me to get my studying done. This is weighing on my mind a lot, and I think compounding how tired I have been feeling.
So today, I work on Calculus, get exercise, get into bed by 10pm and wake up at 5 tomorrow to work out! These things are happening, better get moving.
Only one thing could sidetrack me.... I fear my fridge is broken! Still keeping up hopes it'll suddenly spring back to life. If it breaks, this is my second broken fridge in a year! Bonus, it is totally stocked. I just filled the freezer with meat and the fridge with veggies. Here's hoping I spend today studying and not moving my food to friend's houses.
Trip dreaming
Well, Mexico City is out- unless you count a lay over in the airport. I am sad because I really want to go there now! The history, the art, the giant-ness of the city... Oh well, now I have a new place on my list to visit.
The Mayan Riviera is in though. For one sweet, sweet week in May, I will have nothing to do, but breathe all day. *sigh* I cannot wait!
There will be pyramids, scuba diving, white powdery sand beaches and a lot of tacos!
Come on May!
The Mayan Riviera is in though. For one sweet, sweet week in May, I will have nothing to do, but breathe all day. *sigh* I cannot wait!
There will be pyramids, scuba diving, white powdery sand beaches and a lot of tacos!
Come on May!
Willie Nelson 'n' me
-we have a date, tomorrow night. I can't wait! He is amazing! I saw him about eight years ago.. much too long in between. A living legend, for sure. His voice makes my soul tremble...
Cookin' up Some Wanderin'!
I love to travel, anywhere and everywhere! I always envisioned myself globe trotting, but it has never panned out exactly as I thought it would. Things like bills, obligations and dogs have gotten in the way and I never set out to roam the world freely.
Now, do not think your girl has given up hope, oh no, I do not believe in giving up! However, sometimes we must delay our dreams, but we should never stop thinking, "Someday I will." For me, when I gave up my job as a travel agent to go back to school, I knew I was giving up any hope of travel for a few years and I was ok with that because I knew the end result would be worthwhile.
But, now it is ending! And I am planning, which is my favorite thing to do! Where am I planning to roam to?
Well, these things can morph, but the current idea is to fly to Mexico City and spend a day. Then fly to Cancun, rent a car, and drive down the Riviera Maya stopping at hostels where you can rent a hammock under a palapa for about $12 a night. Then spend a few days scuba diving, exploring ruins, kayaking, and relaxing on the beach. Back to Mexico City for another day of exploration, and then home to the doggies I will have missed terribly!
I am SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is on a budget on less than $700 and will be my first international experience in hosteling. However, the hostel in Mexico City looks amazing!! I will post pics later as planning becomes cemented. There is so much to see and do in Mexico City, I have considered leaving out the Cancun part!
Now, do not think your girl has given up hope, oh no, I do not believe in giving up! However, sometimes we must delay our dreams, but we should never stop thinking, "Someday I will." For me, when I gave up my job as a travel agent to go back to school, I knew I was giving up any hope of travel for a few years and I was ok with that because I knew the end result would be worthwhile.
But, now it is ending! And I am planning, which is my favorite thing to do! Where am I planning to roam to?
Well, these things can morph, but the current idea is to fly to Mexico City and spend a day. Then fly to Cancun, rent a car, and drive down the Riviera Maya stopping at hostels where you can rent a hammock under a palapa for about $12 a night. Then spend a few days scuba diving, exploring ruins, kayaking, and relaxing on the beach. Back to Mexico City for another day of exploration, and then home to the doggies I will have missed terribly!
I am SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is on a budget on less than $700 and will be my first international experience in hosteling. However, the hostel in Mexico City looks amazing!! I will post pics later as planning becomes cemented. There is so much to see and do in Mexico City, I have considered leaving out the Cancun part!
Choices, choices, choices...
I am sick of them! I don't want to make them. I will stomp my foot and pout if need be.
Pivotal, life-changing decisions are not my specialty. When I moved to Corpus is went something like this:
Impulsive: "I am quitting my good job as a travel agent and going back to school full-time! Now, where can I get in so last minute?"
Got into A&M-Corpus.
"No wait, I want to go to A&M, Galveston because they are supposed to be a better school. So, I will apply there."
Got into A&M, Galveston. Visit Galveston to find an apartment. Two days later visit Mom at beach in Corpus. Lease an apartment in Corpus. Decide I am moving to Corpus for school (ya think?).
Back to the present, two and a half years later, it is approaching decision time again, but this is on a much bigger scale and will ultimately greatly effect the next decade of my life. This time where to move involves a few new twists:
#1- Leaving Texas. No way around it. Could be as far and different as Maine, or as close and familiar as Mississippi.
#2- Where I go to graduate school will directly effect the job I get after graduation. If I move to Seattle for grad school, I may have to stay on the west coast for a while. Do I want to do that? I don't know!
#3- At some point, I like to imagine I will become involved in a relationship with a man. Where I move will determine who I meet, or reconnect with, which will effect how my romantic life (or lack there of) plays out. Where does the next love of my life live? (This probably should have been last because this is not a priority by any means, just a fact.)
#4- I may not see my family for a while if I move farther than Mississippi. Am I ok with not seeing them? Do I want a life where my nephews think of me as a mythical creature? A voice on the phone who they speak with on holidays and birthdays?
I am hoping I magically only get accepted into one graduate school, but it is not looking that way. I may be the only person in the world hoping to not get accepted to the schools they applied to! It really is a gut/heart wrenching decision. I have worked so hard and I deserve to go to the best school for my field, but... how can I leave my family, my friends, my whole life so far behind? Conversely if I get into an amazing program, how can I not go? How could I tell a school I once imagined to be out of my league, "No thanks."?
I know things will work out as they should, life works that way, and I am trying to keep an open mind to all possibilities. Right now, I feel lost. I am visiting two schools next month, I sure hope that sheds some light on my dilemma!
Pivotal, life-changing decisions are not my specialty. When I moved to Corpus is went something like this:
Impulsive: "I am quitting my good job as a travel agent and going back to school full-time! Now, where can I get in so last minute?"
Got into A&M-Corpus.
"No wait, I want to go to A&M, Galveston because they are supposed to be a better school. So, I will apply there."
Got into A&M, Galveston. Visit Galveston to find an apartment. Two days later visit Mom at beach in Corpus. Lease an apartment in Corpus. Decide I am moving to Corpus for school (ya think?).
Back to the present, two and a half years later, it is approaching decision time again, but this is on a much bigger scale and will ultimately greatly effect the next decade of my life. This time where to move involves a few new twists:
#1- Leaving Texas. No way around it. Could be as far and different as Maine, or as close and familiar as Mississippi.
#2- Where I go to graduate school will directly effect the job I get after graduation. If I move to Seattle for grad school, I may have to stay on the west coast for a while. Do I want to do that? I don't know!
#3- At some point, I like to imagine I will become involved in a relationship with a man. Where I move will determine who I meet, or reconnect with, which will effect how my romantic life (or lack there of) plays out. Where does the next love of my life live? (This probably should have been last because this is not a priority by any means, just a fact.)
#4- I may not see my family for a while if I move farther than Mississippi. Am I ok with not seeing them? Do I want a life where my nephews think of me as a mythical creature? A voice on the phone who they speak with on holidays and birthdays?
I am hoping I magically only get accepted into one graduate school, but it is not looking that way. I may be the only person in the world hoping to not get accepted to the schools they applied to! It really is a gut/heart wrenching decision. I have worked so hard and I deserve to go to the best school for my field, but... how can I leave my family, my friends, my whole life so far behind? Conversely if I get into an amazing program, how can I not go? How could I tell a school I once imagined to be out of my league, "No thanks."?
I know things will work out as they should, life works that way, and I am trying to keep an open mind to all possibilities. Right now, I feel lost. I am visiting two schools next month, I sure hope that sheds some light on my dilemma!
My Filthy Animal
My black dog, Lola, is a pig. When I found her, she was malnourished and near starving, and I don't believe she has ever gotten past that childhood trauma. Or maybe she is just a fatty at heart! In any case, my little Lola bear often resembles more of a pig and is constantly desperate for food.
Take for example this morning. I fed the dogs their breakfast, ate my breakfast and since I wasn't feeling all that hungry, I fed the dogs some of my eggs and toast. Then I let them outside by themselves while I brushed my teeth. I then head outside to let them out into our bigger side yard and my brown dog, Bella, is sitting on the back step looking at me and furiously wagging her tail. I know this look. This look says, 'Mom it wasn't me, I had no part in this. In fact, I begged her not to do it!'
So I call Lola. Nothing. Oh gosh, what is she into? I call her again, she bolts around the corner. Now, the fenced in back yard I had left them in for five minutes is not very large, maybe the size of the living room and the kitchen, so I don't see what could have taken her so long. Therefore, I peek around the corner. What I see and smell causes my stomach to turn and I emit some sort of startled "Bah!"-like sound.
What did I see which horrified me so? My compost bin, which has not been performing well lately. In fact, I had put off plans to build a new one last weekend because I was so busy, but the building of a new and improved compost bin was on my 'To Do' list. It was pretty high up on the list because it wasn't breaking down food and yard litter very well. And by 'very well' I mean, it was sort of a rotting pile of vegetables compounded by an over-saturation of water due to our recent rain. It was in a closed bin, but I guess Lola figured out how to open it because she had removed a great quantity of what I can best describe as sludge.
The smell was indescribable, but I will try. Take a smelly litter box, add in the salad you forgot about in the bottom of the fridge that one time and then top it off with some good old standing water- and you are close. It was funky, overpowering and nauseating.
I hurriedly put the lid back on it and usher the girls into the back yard to do their business, all the while verbally expressing my disappointment with Lola. At this point, I have class in twenty minutes. When they are finished I let them back inside, still verbally expressing my displeasure with Lola. She tucks her tail under her legs and jumps on my futon. And then I smell it. She smells like the compost pile.
I mean, of course she does, she was probably ass deep in the nasty pile of rotting refuse. She has gotten it on my futon, which is lucky because the futon is washable whereas had she jumped on the micro-suede couch, well you can imagine. I then realize, I cannot go to class without endangering everything I own. I have no way to quickly contain her, their kennel in somewhere in th garage because I never use it. It has suddenly gone from being class time to doggie shower time.
Needless to say, I am not thrilled with Lola, however as I bathe her I begin to feel less like I want to beat her and develop more of a sense of humor about the subject. A dog is a dog after all, and even a good dog sometimes like to roll in a rotting fish, chew up a calculator, or just eat a few feet of compost. To love someone is to embrace their faults, and I guess Lola is a pig, and I don't think she is gonna change.
And hey, now I have the morning off to catch up on homework. I love you Lola for the filthy animal you are.
Take for example this morning. I fed the dogs their breakfast, ate my breakfast and since I wasn't feeling all that hungry, I fed the dogs some of my eggs and toast. Then I let them outside by themselves while I brushed my teeth. I then head outside to let them out into our bigger side yard and my brown dog, Bella, is sitting on the back step looking at me and furiously wagging her tail. I know this look. This look says, 'Mom it wasn't me, I had no part in this. In fact, I begged her not to do it!'
So I call Lola. Nothing. Oh gosh, what is she into? I call her again, she bolts around the corner. Now, the fenced in back yard I had left them in for five minutes is not very large, maybe the size of the living room and the kitchen, so I don't see what could have taken her so long. Therefore, I peek around the corner. What I see and smell causes my stomach to turn and I emit some sort of startled "Bah!"-like sound.
What did I see which horrified me so? My compost bin, which has not been performing well lately. In fact, I had put off plans to build a new one last weekend because I was so busy, but the building of a new and improved compost bin was on my 'To Do' list. It was pretty high up on the list because it wasn't breaking down food and yard litter very well. And by 'very well' I mean, it was sort of a rotting pile of vegetables compounded by an over-saturation of water due to our recent rain. It was in a closed bin, but I guess Lola figured out how to open it because she had removed a great quantity of what I can best describe as sludge.
The smell was indescribable, but I will try. Take a smelly litter box, add in the salad you forgot about in the bottom of the fridge that one time and then top it off with some good old standing water- and you are close. It was funky, overpowering and nauseating.
I hurriedly put the lid back on it and usher the girls into the back yard to do their business, all the while verbally expressing my disappointment with Lola. At this point, I have class in twenty minutes. When they are finished I let them back inside, still verbally expressing my displeasure with Lola. She tucks her tail under her legs and jumps on my futon. And then I smell it. She smells like the compost pile.
I mean, of course she does, she was probably ass deep in the nasty pile of rotting refuse. She has gotten it on my futon, which is lucky because the futon is washable whereas had she jumped on the micro-suede couch, well you can imagine. I then realize, I cannot go to class without endangering everything I own. I have no way to quickly contain her, their kennel in somewhere in th garage because I never use it. It has suddenly gone from being class time to doggie shower time.
Needless to say, I am not thrilled with Lola, however as I bathe her I begin to feel less like I want to beat her and develop more of a sense of humor about the subject. A dog is a dog after all, and even a good dog sometimes like to roll in a rotting fish, chew up a calculator, or just eat a few feet of compost. To love someone is to embrace their faults, and I guess Lola is a pig, and I don't think she is gonna change.
And hey, now I have the morning off to catch up on homework. I love you Lola for the filthy animal you are.
